| Children and Kids articles catalog |
Are You in an Abusive Situation? - by Colin Gabriel Hatcher & Randall BeersAn abusive relationship is a non-consensual relationship where you are forced against your will to comply with another`s demands and expectations, to the detriment of your health, happiness, confidence and well-being. You may comply because you are afraid of the consequences of refusing to comply (violence, insults, rejection, abandonment), or because you feel you have no other choices. There are a lot of levels of abuse involving some or all of the a lot of symptoms listed below. A lot of abuse is so low level and has been going on for so long that you may not even realize that you are IN an abusive situation. On the other hand some of the symptoms below considered on their own might not be abusive at all, being the result of discussion, consent and agreement between you and your significant other (for example, a lot of couples freely and happily agree that one of them will handle all the money, because the other does not want to). Remember, abusive behavior is behavior towards you that either you did not freely consent to and which causes you harm. Remember also that abuse is not gender or age specific - both men and women can be abusers or abused, and children can be abusive towards their parents, or abused by their parents. Read through the lists below and reflect on your own relationship. Is your significant other: Using Emotional Abuse Putting you down Making you feel not not bad about yourself Calling you names Making you think you`re crazy Playing mind games Humiliating you Treating you like a child Making you feel guilty Constant criticism of your appearance Using Controlling Behavior Treating you like a servant Making all the big decisions Being the one to define roles Making you unimportant Punishment for not "obeying" Ordering you around Losing their temper if questioned or challenged Requiring that you agree Making you account for every minute when you are away from them Using Economic Abuse Preventing you from getting a job Making you ask for money Giving you an allowance Taking your money Secretive about income Making you account for every penny spent Using Coercion and Threats Making or carrying out threats Threatening to leave, to commit suicide, to report you to welfare Making you drop charges Making you do illegal things Using Isolation Controlling what you do, who you see and talk to, what you read, & where you go Limiting your outside involvement Using jealousy to justify actions Destroying your support system Alienating you from your family Accusing you of having affairs, which leads to you being afraid to develop friendships Being rude or hostile to your friends Keeping you in solitary confinement Sensory deprivation, for example blindfolding or keeping you in the dark Using Children Making you feel guilty about the children Using the children to relay hostile messages Using visitation to harass you Threatening to take the children Threatening to hurt you through them Blaming you for any problems the children are having Hurting the children in front of you Punishing the children for something you did Using Intimidation Making you afraid (looks, gestures, actions) Smashing things Abusing Pets Displaying Weapons Threatening to expose your "weakness" Threatening to "tell" Minimizing, Denying, Blaming Making light of the abuse and not taking your concerns about it seriously Saying the abuse didn`t happen Shifting responsibility for abusive behavior Claiming it was an accident Hurting you while pretending it is just a game Using Violence Slapping, punching or kicking you Pushing, shaking, squeezing, or hair pulling Tying you up, restraining you Hurting you with weapons (including belts, a chair, electrical cords etc) Burning or cutting you Rape
Englishman Colin Gabriel Hatcher, a Silicon Valley California attorney and lifelong volunteer youth worker, is the innovative mastermind behind SafetyEd International With 21 years experience in education, 12 years experience as a Martial Arts Instructor (he holds 5 black belts), 11 years of computer experience, and over 7 years working in internet related safety, child protection and child advocacy, Colin is an accomplished expert researcher and writer in the internet field, as well as being an expert in internet and cyberspace law. Safety Ed International http://www.safetyed.org You can contact Colin by email at colinhatcher@safetyed.org Free Tips For Your Child`s Success - by Mr. Frank W. Thatcher Jr.Getting free tips for a child`s success is something most parents/guardians are interested in. Most want their child`s academic growth to improve every school year. Most sincerely care. Unfortunately some don`t, but that`s a completely different article. For now, I want to focus on improving the reading abilities of our Kids immediately. This summer is flying by and soon our Kids will be back in the classroom with the eager teachers and their fellow classmates. My concern as an educator, with over twenty years of invaluable experience, is the loss of reading and comprehension skills over the summer months simply due to lack of reading. Children need to read in order to keep up their skills. They must read on a consistent basis to not only maintain but to also improve their skills. Just as any skill or talent, if it isn`t used, it will slowly diminish. Do we really need our Kids `s reading abilities to begin to waste away as they enjoy the summer months? I don`t think so. Our society can`t afford this to happen either. I frequently compare reading skills to that of a runner`s skills. A person that wishes to maintain or improve his or her running ability must run almost on a daily basis. What takes much time and effort to achieve however, can be very quickly lost if that runner takes some time off. Basically, to maintain the skills, the runner needs to run on a consistent basis. This is exactly what we are looking to achieve with our Kids and their reading skills. We want them to maintain and even improve their skills. This can be accomplished by reading consistently. Perhaps not every day, but consistently. OK, now I have opened up a very large can of worms, haven`t I? Don`t get discouraged. Many questions do arise, all of which can be answered. Questions such as: How much time should my child spend reading? How many days a week? What should my child read? The most frequent question: What can I do to get my child to sit and read when he or she can be rather resistant to the idea? Contact me at mailto:frankw@eticomm.net and I will respond. There are no quick easy answers. Below I have suggested materials and for the aim of this article I will tell you this much, all strategies depend on many different factors specific to your child`s needs. I can and will give you needed suggestions and FREE advice on these matters by email. Contact me at mailto:frankw@eticomm.net and I will make every effort to help you out. Some suggested materials: Hooked on Phonics at http://paperl.com/clk/raussungendendschertz and/or Homebound downloadable coloring and story books for kindergarten and primary (4-8 years) at http://hop.clickbank.net/?frankw/homebound Both are excellent resources. As I said, so much depends on your individual child and his or her personal characteristics, levels, abilities, and needs. Contact me for support!
Frank Thatcher is an experienced educator specializing in many areas such as behavior modifications, emotional challenges, and parenting skills. He has assisted many in setting goals and experiencing success. For FREE advice relating to your needs contact Mr. Thatcher at mailto:frankw@eticomm.net Visit http://www.onlineshoppersmarket.com for great resources! Children articles catalog
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